an.4.53 Aṅguttara Nikāya (Numbered Discourses)

Living Together (1)

On one occasion the Blessed One was traveling along the highway between Madhurā and Verañjā. A number of male and female householders were also traveling along the same highway. Then the Blessed One left the highway and sat down at the foot of a tree. The male and female householders saw the Blessed One sitting there and approached him, paid homage to him, and sat down to one side. The Blessed One then said to them:

“Householders, there are these four ways of living together. What four? A wretch lives together with a wretch; a wretch lives together with a female deva; a deva lives together with a wretch; a deva lives together with a female deva.

(1) “And how, householders, does a wretch live together with a wretch? Here, the husband is one who destroys life, takes what is not given, engages in sexual misconduct, speaks falsely, and indulges in liquor, wine, and intoxicants, the basis for heedlessness; he is immoral, of bad character; he dwells at home with a heart obsessed by the stain of miserliness; he insults and reviles ascetics and brahmins. And his wife is also one who destroys life … she insults and reviles ascetics and brahmins. It is in such a way that a wretch lives together with a wretch.

(2) “And how does a wretch live together with a female deva? Here, the husband is one who destroys life … he insults and reviles ascetics and brahmins. But his wife is one who abstains from the destruction of life, from taking what is not given, from sexual misconduct, from false speech, and from liquor, wine, and intoxicants, the basis for heedlessness; she is virtuous, of good character; she dwells at home with a heart free from the stain of miserliness; she does not insult or revile ascetics and brahmins. It is in such a way that a wretch lives together with a female deva.

(3) “And how does a deva live together with a wretch? Here, the husband is one who abstains from the destruction of life … he does not insult or revile ascetics and brahmins. But his wife is one who destroys life … she insults and reviles ascetics and brahmins. It is in such a way that a deva lives together with a wretch.

(4) “And how does a deva live together with a female deva? Here, the husband is one who abstains from the destruction of life … he does not insult or revile ascetics and brahmins. And his wife is also one who abstains from the destruction of life … she does not insult or revile ascetics and brahmins. It is in such a way that a deva lives together with a female deva.

“These are the four ways of living together.”

When both are immoral,
miserly and abusive,
husband and wife
live together as wretches.

The husband is immoral,
miserly and abusive,
but his wife is virtuous,
charitable, generous.
She is a female deva living
with a wretched husband.

The husband is virtuous,
charitable, generous,
but his wife is immoral,
miserly and abusive.
She is a wretch living
with a deva husband.

Both husband and wife are endowed with faith,
charitable and self-controlled,
living their lives righteously,
addressing each other with pleasant words.

Then many benefits accrue to them
and they dwell at ease.
Their enemies are saddened
when both are the same in virtue.

Having practiced the Dhamma here,
the same in virtuous behavior and observances,
delighting after death in a deva world,
they rejoice, enjoying sensual pleasures.

- Translator: Bhikkhu Bodhi

- Editor: Blake Walsh

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Living Together (1st)

At one time the Buddha was traveling along the road between Madhura and Verañja,
as were several householders, both women and men.
The Buddha left the road and sat at the root of a tree,
where the householders saw him.
They went up to the Buddha, bowed, and sat down to one side. The Buddha said to them:
“Householders, there are four ways of living together.
What four?
A male zombie living with a female zombie;
a male zombie living with a goddess;
a god living with a female zombie;
a god living with a goddess.
And how does a male zombie live with a female zombie?
It’s when the husband kills living creatures, steals, commits sexual misconduct, lies, and uses alcoholic drinks that cause negligence. He’s unethical, of bad character, living at home with his heart full of the stain of stinginess, abusing and insulting ascetics and brahmins.
And the wife is also … unethical, of bad character …
That’s how a male zombie lives with a female zombie.
And how does a male zombie live with a goddess?
It’s when the husband … is unethical, of bad character …
But the wife doesn’t kill living creatures, steal, commit sexual misconduct, lie, or use alcoholic drinks that cause negligence. She’s ethical, of good character, living at home with her heart rid of the stain of stinginess, not abusing and insulting ascetics and brahmins.
That’s how a male zombie lives with a goddess.
And how does a god live with a female zombie?
It’s when the husband … is ethical, of good character …
But the wife … is unethical, of bad character …
That’s how a god lives with a female zombie.
And how does a god live with a goddess?
It’s when the husband … is ethical, of good character …
And the wife is also … ethical, of good character …
That’s how a god lives with a goddess.
These are the four ways of living together.
When both are unethical,
miserly and abusive,
then wife and husband
live together as zombies.
When the husband is unethical,
miserly and abusive,
but the wife is ethical,
bountiful, rid of stinginess,
she’s a goddess living
with a zombie for a husband.
When the husband is ethical,
bountiful, rid of stinginess,
but the wife is unethical,
miserly and abusive,
she’s a zombie living
with a god for a husband.
When both are faithful and bountiful,
disciplined, living righteously,
then wife and husband
say nice things to each other.
They get all the things they need,
so they live at ease.
Their enemies are downhearted,
when both are equal in ethics.
Having practiced the teaching here,
both equal in precepts and observances,
they delight in the heavenly realm,
enjoying all the pleasures they desire.”